I didn’t plan to announce this blog tonight. Certainly not without Paul here, and definitely not the night before my divorce hearing. I never claimed to have stellar timing.

That said, as I sit here I can’t think of any reason not to. You see, I found out today that my ex plans to attempt to use the photo from the geek dinner post against me in court tomorrow, among many, MANY other printouts of my online activities. I have to kind of connect the dots here, but I can only assume the ‘my kitchen’ written on the printout means they plan to make some sort of a statement about the fact that Paul was here in August. A statement that as far as I can see will affect absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of things. We will still be getting divorced, and my kids still are not aware of Paul’s existence and won’t be until the legalities on both sides are done. Ian hadn’t lived here for 5 months when that picture was taken, and it was 14 months after I’d filed for divorce.

What has changed however is that I now know that my ex knows about this website. I suspected before, but we weren’t sure, and in an attempt not to aggravate the current climate, we kept this site low-key and didn’t really use it.

Fuck that.

As far as I’m concerned we are now officially bringing PaulandSara.us out of the closet. We started this site as a way to document the journey we are taking together, but then hesitated, not knowing how to proceed with all the court stuff.

The truth is that when we got together, we were both married. Neither of us have tried to deny it, or claim that what we did was not an affront to our already-dying relationships. We have each paid enormous costs for those actions, and there are and continue to be ramifications for what we have done.

That said, who we are and how we started are common knowledge. We have both in our separate legal situations taken the stand and admitted what we have done. We have both blogged about it. Everyone who knows us well enough to know us both are aware that we started down this road in less than ideal circumstances. This is, to be quite honest, last year’s news in all respects.

I’m done with worrying about what anyone else thinks, and what is going to be held up in court next. What this has shown me is that clearly anyone who wants to find what we are doing online, even if we don’t promote it, is going to find it. If they want to be obsessive and make themselves feel bad, that’s their issue, not ours.

We are moving on with our lives, both online and off.